The meaning of life's tragedy
Reflecting on how I lived before I properly introduced my artistic Works before I do so in the next one or two articles.
After I was about six years old things never seemed to be hospitable for me. I felt as if I was in my own private dimension, especially when contrasted with the distorted values of public school. Indeed it was as if I was in a video game just to walk around in the world I knew. Video games and books and such things felt more real than real life.
Later with direct inspiration from a lot of artistic works and John K's blog I started constructing my own world. Each comic book I planned or other work such as a video game was really an instance of this larger world. This was the most productive thing to do with my prior alienation. And perhaps if I continued I could make the world a friendlier place for people like me in the next Generations.
I also seem to have quite a lot of artistic power, such as the ability to make a better version of a game after I played it. This seemed to be incredibly valuable for society. Perhaps I would move around from game Studio to game Studio to make sequels and other things for their Productions. Perhaps I would even make a clone of another Studio’s series sometimes!
Of course it all ended in disaster. Instead of doing anything like that in the Art Fields I saw profane and stupid people enjoy derivations from my artistic Constructions I had set up online for myself and other people to use such as Michelle of Ava's demon. Derivations such as Homestuck, gravity falls, Rick Riordan's work, and other such ultimately stupid things. They do have their good sides. But anything good about them could be done so much better, and they used their incredible enthusiasm they received from their fans to seek power and influence in society. Ultimately it is simply lightning thefted.
Not even lightning in a bottle, a term people use for solitary artistic works that were incredibly resonant whose creators can't make again. They stole what made them successful, and as a result they increasingly decayed over the years like a rotting zombie.
My original personal design was very simple. I wanted to go to game studios and impress them with what I could do. I'm something of a re-creator, making series anew imbuing them with new traits and refinements as I envisioned in my mind with freespace 3, Grand Theft Auto 6, Half-Life 3, and other such visions over the years. Some before my disaster and some after. I also liked to think of taking on the Metal Gear series even as an American, as Kojima wanted to give it up. Often this involved Cosmic and heavenly things, such as astral gears and demonic gears.
I also wanted to move in with ipgd as she wanted. However after she became involved with Homestuck that resembled throwing myself into evisceration. Prior to that I wanted to make a lot of art friends who benefited and learned from my artistic efforts which formed a revolution - my full aims where to lead directly into starting one of the largest corporations in the world but of course I couldn't expect that to happen. Working together with various artists to make my own projects and assist those of others would be good enough for me. But almost all of them went woke and the few who didn't like Michelle were harried by the woke to give in.
In the end I was left with some plagiarists profiting off of my efforts for all like idiots and some good artists I had no involvement with proceeding on. Lingering in in poverty which got worse for reasons like that my abusive “dad" could smell the money being made which had something to do with me. I went off into my own internet place like the most indescribably laughable instance ever of taking your ball and going home.
It is clear that this is not the way things should have gone, a realization John Kricfalusi had himself in the course of his life. After all I became basically married to ipgd. In fact it resembles a special type of marriage that does not normally actually exist in this world, which goes along with the various heavenly and otherwise spiritual things of my content as it is all connected to the End Times. Which contributed heavily to my basic inability to function after all those events. After a few years my various artistic works didn't even develop further anymore.
It amounts to a stress test for careerism ( something that young people probably often call capitalism) as eventually, meaning right now, many projects such as at Disney in the mainstream are directly connected to the pillaging of one person's artistic marriage and internet home. You have to wonder how far things can go when they are connected by many strands to a single individual who received no reimbursement of any kind ever.
In my spiritual communication with the Lord He has emphasized the God Hand, which is basically an Exodia made of various points of plagiarism from me which I can gradually power up over time to function; annihilating my enemies artistically.
There are other ways to see how things did not go correctly. Merely the fact that they did not go correctly is good enough justification to see things go right, even though people normally expect to go to heaven and leave everything in this world behind. There's a lot of mystery in how that happens though.
Things such as my mother's names for her pets point to this also. She seemed to have an understated interest in fiction, but never really said anything about it except about some works such as Armageddon. Perhaps she was waiting for a good husband to share in this interest.
During about a year using Twitter and mainly interacting with ipgd was like heaven. She got a puppy and ipgd called it kawaii when I posted the photo, she didn't respond about any other of the animals.
This dog was named Pepper which reminds me of Tony Stark as we share the same first name. I don't think I ever mentioned the name. I would talk about family members being confused about its sex. She grew up to be huge and dark brown. Such an interpretation of the name was confirmed by my sister naming her cat Domino, who later had a giant poster of Deadpool on her wall.
It seemed that if there was a Multiverse things happen regardless of how much adversity was in the way of them happening. Explaining how effortlessly and quickly I became involved with ipgd and set up things like the cool kawaii group at the same time I was getting shrieked at by Homestuck readers.
Later my mother picked up from Craigslist two giant cats. Their names were Callie and Bozo. One Homestuck character is named Callie sometimes and Caliborn had a clown theme though I declared it to not be a nice name and never used it. In my imagination Lord English is never associated with clowns, might as well replace that with being a scientist. Perhaps clowns are a slur at black people as only being a source of entertainment: “dance you clowns, give us more rap songs and movies and sports and make nothing more of it"
These cats show that things also come together even if I was distracted by the various disasters on the internet. In that house she had the cats, when I was there, I remember her screaming and crying “It hurt so much". I don't remember what it was about but perhaps it was a temporally disconnected response to the severe challenges we faced back then.
ipgd also seemed to have an understanding of how badly things went. Once in the homestuck threads I criticized her for being obsessed with gay. On her Twitter she seemed to cry and asked for someone to post the video of Revolver Ocelot telling Venom Snake he wanted to bring the legend back to life again. Years earlier I referred to myself as eventually becoming The Legend, which as a fan of Metal Gear Solid kind of hurt that nobody noticed it. It's nice to think of people noticing those things in an alternate world.
Now that I am just about introducing my greatest and grandest setting, perhaps afterwards I can begin to bring things together as they should. After all, being connected by many strands to one of the biggest corporations in the world; it's a lot of power. Perhaps I will do this just before the Multiverse is actually real.
The big cats scared my sister's cat, so I kept them in my room while they visited. She meowed and jumped at me for protection. Meanwhile my mother's dog sat completely still staring once and shook her tail very rapidly, so I went back in.